Some random things....

1)Life has been good.Always.Maybe because I dint expect much from life.I am usually content with what I have and appreciate it.

2)I strongly believe in Service to humanity is Service to God. I dont go about praying and performing puja everyday.It has to be inside you. Helping a beggar with some change gives me more satisfaction than spending 10 min praying.

3)I realised that when I want something badly and pray for it, or wish for it, it eludes me.

4)I laugh at my mistakes.A hearty one. That helps me bear myself.Or I would have been dead meat by now.

5)I live to eat.

6)I love myself.

7)I get inspired easily.I continuoulsy change myself to make myself better. Anything that impresses me,I try to incorporate that in my life. I think before every action..I introspect after my every action. I make a mental note of "Dont do it again" if my action was "wrong" or hurt anybody.
So I dont know who I actually am.
I dont know my definition.
I am continually changing, for the better.

8)I am tired of  trying to be the mature/good human being. Sometimes I want to let go...and do things without bothering about the consequences.

9)When I am waiting... I can think of nothing but that I AM WAITING

10)Songs, these days are heavily dependent on music. You just cannot hum them if there is no music. And its very colloqial..less poetic.
teri meri ..meri teri..prem kahani hai mushkil....its just the permutation and combinationof words...

11)Five good songs  in a row..in paach pataka on FM cheers me up.The drive to office is more bearable then.
But that  rarely happens .

12)I changed a lot in 5 years. I hated myself back then. I was that stupid,overtly-self-conscious introvert.
Now,I am NOT :)

13)We have panipuri every single night..while going back home from office, followed by coconut water.
This is one thing that I love most about us.

14)I know almost all the panipuri wallahs in my locality. They know me too.

15)I love Hyderabad.It gave me koti,charminar and general bazar. And ofcourse a lot of fabulous restaurants. And a gupchup bandi at every corner.

16)I hate Hyderabad.It gave me only those.

17)Plz is as good as not saying Please at all. Same with Thx or wc. I hate these shortcuts.

18) Bad is attractive.

19) Maggi and Panipuri are the simplest, tastiest,cheapest, easiest food on earth. I can live on them.And ofcourse   dal  Chawal. And aloo fry. And ice gola. And enuf !

20) You can tell I am the simplest person on earth when I say
       I like Vanilla.

The invisible photographer

Happiness doesnt come knocking..nor can that be planned.Life's some of the best moments are least expected. And when we are least prepared.

The first time you sneezed when you were just a newborn.. That toothless smile which can only repeat when you are 80 , The beautiful sunrise, When you are helping a 5 yr old finish her math homework and are clueless as to how to explain her quotient and reminder..The time when you shouted your lungs out while riding your scooty...When you oiled your hair and neatly combed them into 2 plaits..and looked awful..When you broke into a jig unknowingly when your favourite song started playing...When you laughed till your stomach ached,tears streaming down your cheeks,the only thought running through your mind is "when will I laugh like this again..", The thrill of a surprise gift , There is a production abend..and you and your team is working frantically to get things right,tension mounting..time slipping... brains working...That evening when my wedding date was fixed ..you should have seen my dad's face,happy like a child..rushing to me with the news ,happiness writ large on his face and many pairs of moist eyes around..That special someone said something nice that tugged at your heartstrings..the emotion..the moment that you shared with him are matchless..timeless..and precious..

These were moments in your life that were important to you, affected you in some way, good or bad or neither..and they remain with you as memories , as feelings, but like many other things, get lost in hordes of other memories.

As time passes..we are left with only memories..and as more time passes, even memory leaves us.

This is when I wish, wish God created a photographer too.an invisible one.. who would stay by my side..capture everything on his lens.. when i cry..when i laugh..when i shout..when i frown..And when the time comes where I have time for myself, I can rewind, unwind and relive my past.

I think camera is the best thing man created. .. the moment is paused.and it remains with u forever .Ofcourse unless you lose it.

Shubh DiWaLi !

The festival of lights is here... in all its glory. It was my favourite festival when I was a kid, burning crackers, lighting up the house , aarthi in the evening.. it was all there..the festive air !

But for the past 3 years , it has been a silent dowali..for me. Green Diwali. No crackers.

Here is wishing you all, a very happy Diwali !

lOVe

We thought it was the coolest thing we did , 5 years ago, on this very day. We professed love for each other and were glad the feeling was mutual.We were revelling in our new-found relationship..unaware of the challenges life was going to throw at us...not knowing what to expect..careless about our future..we were selfish. It was just "us" then.

I am happy the "us" still remains.Solidly intact. :)

It had more to it than just movies,roaming around on bikes, having panipuri on the roadside, bunking classes, chatting for hours, surprise gifts and saying "I Love You"

Its not about cosy postures that the movie posters show , its not at all about romantic punchlines, long drives, romantic dinners , wearing same coloured dresses, pick ups and drops...This is just the rosy picture..

There is more to it than meets the eye.

There was a time when a small gift, a long drive, occasional lunches, complimenting each other meant love.Atleast, it was a way of showing that you love him/her.
And then comes change.A big one.

Love, like anything else, evolves.It cannot remain in that stage forever.It starts demanding maturity.And strength. Its not the cosy postures anymore.There will be lesser gifts. Love is being happy despite these. Love is knowing he still loves you. Love is  knowing he is still there for you.

For me , its a great learning experience.I know myself now like never before. I was like on the road to self-discovery where I was sure startled by my unpleasant traits.
I came face-to-face with the other side of me which I never knew existed.
We were bettering eachother, overcoming our flaws.Yes, flaws. Nobody is perfect.

A lot of things changed over these 5 years. And a lot din't.

We still fight, but for better reasons.

We still disagree, but learnt to accept gracefully.

We still gift each other, not monetory now-a-days.

I still feel jealous, but learnt to brush it off.

We still shout at each other, but we understand.

This is where we stand now. And I am proud of where we are :)

Chillar party

A very cute , adorable , hilarious movie. It will make you laugh. And before you know, your eyes become moist.I struggled to stop my tears ! Those innocent , arrogant , sometimes sensible, sometimes stubborn bunch of cuties gave me a real good time. How I loved them . Each is cute in his won way.

I particularly liked Jhangya who doesnt like wearing a chaddi :D
His antics , dramatics, attitude is just hilarious ! The way he says halla bol ! , the way he tries to hide his ignorance when asked what an NOC is,.. DDLJ ..and stuff.. man ! awesome !He is such a nautanki !
I was actually laughing out loud !

The TV show was good too.Made sense . Thats the only way a child should have dealt with the minister.
Because he hasnt seen life much yet.What they have learnt is from the school, from the books . And its put to best use.

In short,  Its a must watch !

Confessions !

                       

                                      Its high time I made a confession.

Nothing in this blog is fiction.None imaginary as assumed by some. The various characters I created just bear a different name. The girl is me and the boy is him :)

Wanna read them again with me in mind ? Here u go! Not many , but still...
The colorful Night
Everything Outta nOthing !
When U knOw its HiM :)

When you know its HiM :)

 This has been long pending. I had this urge to write everytime I was in "the" moment.But I felt it more important to bask in the happiness , to savour every second of the truth that just  dawned , with a smile that originated from the lips and reached the eyes.

The moment is when you know its HIM.

I had this so many times. Even before we decided to be a couple. Some sound silly  but they meant a lot to me then. Some incidents just linger in my mind...

It was raining heavily.I was waiting at the bus stop. I just wished he would comeby. And there he was ,on his bike , dripping wet. I guess he was thinking about me because he was rightly able to identify me among scores of other people, all under umbrellas.I dint go with him , something stopped me though a major portion of me wanted to go with him. We were still friends , still in that beautiful phase where feelings play hide-n-seek, secret smiles, where we were constantly looking for hints that suggested a possible relationship.

I was not feeling well that day.I was contemplating if I should ask him to drop me till my office. It was as if he read my mind when he offered to drop me  even before I asked.
Whats the big deal you ask ?
He drives 25km to office, with me behind. Its an extra 8km roundabout trip to my office.I was contemplating because I know how much pain it is to drive 50km everyday.

We were travelling to office.On his bike. Both were quiet for a long time. Then he took my hand in his and said "Love you".My moist eyes stand testimony of the effect it had on me.

I forgot my purse yet again.In the theater we just walked out from. The next show had already started. We both waited till the interval, then went in and started looking under the seats awkwardly. Embarrasing it was !
He scolded me left and right for being so careless.
I was surprised to find a smile on my face when I should actually be crying.
I sensed a feeling of belonging to him , his voice was firm but the eyes said something else.

I  feel nothing can go wrong with him around.Even if it does, I can bank on him to steer us clear. We always ended up all-smiles when we faced problems together !

I can be myself in front of him. There is no pretense.Never. He can see me through.

I dont mind acting stupid when he is around. I know he doesnt mind :D

My eyes light up whenever I see him.

I still try to impress him

I still blush.

I still make a fuss over how I look when I have a date with him.
   

I still long for that look in his eyes.

One look at him , I see the same depth, same truthfulness , same commitment in the decision we made 6 years ago.

Its not because of these reasons that I think its him. These only make my belief stronger.Such realisations help me sail through when the weather gets rough. It reminds me of what is between us. Of what we share. That we are not meant to wither.

Waking up to a lesson...!

Its an amazing feeling..to be able to sleep till late mornings.There is nothing that can beat the satisfaction and bliss it provides.Oblivious to all the chaos around, blissfully unware of  the hurried movements of my mom and dad going about their usual chores, I was buried. In deep sleep. Under a thick blanket. Lost in my own world.

Until I was rudely woken up.

By none other than the maid.

I heard something that sounded like a distant thrashing that slowly became louder and louder. Well it was not the sound, but I was becoming more and more alive , and coming back to my senses.My eyes still refused to open and so I pulled over the pillow over my ears to shut the noise out.

The noise was compounded by the running water, screeching sound of buckets..and more thrashing.Of the clothes. I opened my eyes a teeny bit and saw a blurred figure in the bathroom.That was our bai. She was washing our clothes.

I cursed her for not doing her job silently. For being inconsiderate. For making those horrendous sound. For not taking care as to not wake me up.

I looked at the watch with disgust.

It said 9.00 AM

Just then she turned. I could see sweat dripping from the brow. She was carrying a bucket full of water..and gasping for breath. I could see her nerves popping out of her arm due to the weight.

All my anger..disgust..B.P vanished.

What must she have been thinking all along ? A young gal, sleeping without budging till 9 am while she was cleaning my clothes, sweeping the floor and doing all dirty odd jobs in my house.Everyday is the same .No weekend. No holiday . Not until she fell sick. Same old dirty job. And meagre money.

With this realisation, I woke up.

... Its back to create a ruffle ....

Life is not letting me be in peace... It keeps reminding me that it cannot be perfect..there exists some besharam creature called problem that creeps stealthily..slyly..and very soon you see ripples on the once calm surface..

Ok. They are not problems actually..but minor glitches, hiccups that created a slight furore.Just when I thought that all was well and sat back, It raised its ugly hood again..testing my patience, my attitude , almost defining my character. I had to come out unscathed and leave others unscathed too.That was a major challenge.This time it was Not only me slipping into the pit..I was dragging quite a few people with me.

It was all momentary..the anguish..the pain..the "wots-happening-with-me !!" feeling , confusion, tension, nervousness and what not . I guess everybody has a phase in their life where they are put to test, and its most important for them to come out with flying colors.I think its my turn and I am trying my best to make the best out of it.

When you have wonderful parents for support..when you have that awesome person who stands by you all the time..and most importantly a forgetful mind which easily forgets the pain inflicted on it..life becomes easier!

And ya.. I also believe that things happen for a reason and believe me, that relieves me like anything!
That makes me look at the problem at hand from a different angle, with a positive thought and the problem seems like a smaller problem. No. It doesnt vanish.It only becomes smaller.And better.

Have to pack its bags and throw it out..off I go !

Bye!

The meeting is over !

My eyes are tired and heavy and full of sleep. They want to close , shut the world out , and plunge into dark, deep bliss. How wonderful and serene would that be ... to be able to close whenever you want to . Thats one priceless gift !

My eyes are trying hard to keep them open ... my mind is trying harder to register whatever they are seeing , trying even more harder to produce fewer yawns , shut my mouth and keep my eyes open..

I can see people sitting around me .. some lip movements .. some animated talking.. and I can feel myself nodding vigorously.. maybe its the routine that programmed it .

I can hear some sound ..somebody talking .. they fall on my ears and just rebound.. I am helpless , totally conquered ..numb .. senseless..like in a trance.

Somebody asked something and I turned around..I saw a hazy picture of Sriraj talking interestedly with the client... i wondered which planet he came from..

I am staring at John  Romano .. blankly .. looking at his eyes and nodding at times.but only I know that I am staring at something much beyond.. into the beautiful world of slumber..

Just then my ears caught an interesting phrase...and my eyes had something interesting and pleasing to see..

"Thank you ! "

 

The meeting is over . I can look at that forever !

PS : I tried hard..really hard.. to listen to what John was saying , but failed. I penned this in the 2 hr session that we had immediately after lunch after efforts to keep myself awake went futile !  

PPS :  In the screen shot you can see all the tabs that I opened to keep myself interested..gmail..blogspot..FB .. but none came to my rescue !

Too much to keep to myself....

Hallo !!

Its my 1..2..3..4..5..6th day in deerfield beach and looks like I have gotten used to it.There are somethings I like.. and somethings that I literally hate !There are things I look forward to and some that I avoid ...I guess its der everywhere...lets cut the crap..will come straight to the point.This post is just crap I say.. some random things that I did and some that I had to do ..

I am surprisingly liking the cooking part.I am not a big fan of it,I m not cribbing too! My day begins with rigorous brainstorming about what should go as my breakfast ( rigorous because I dnt have much time).. and ends with again a mental analysis of what would be good to cook for dinner that day and lunch the next day !
It takes a lot of analysis believe me.. first you have to check the inventory ( what u have).. what is easier to cook.. it should be tasty too.. what you can take in your tiffin box... what requires minimal effort...and what you can be proud of !
Here are some of the results :

This was the first day.Was too tired to cook anything.I even forgot that I had chilly powder and salt.Had this egg with bread.

Another disaster.I again forgot to cary a rolling pin.After trying to roll the chapatis with a jam bottle , I gave up and thought my hands were good enough.The dough was too hard. Learnt things the hardest way !
The spinach curry was too good though !I have my basics right...Somebody neednt worry !!:D

And then I was making this tomato curry.Easiest and mouth watering.But something had to go wrong.Thats how things work with me.So, as per God's plan, I put haldi again..thinking it was chilly powder !

Hope you had a good laugh ! I had one too !

Adios... :)

comment plzzz !

Would be glad if somebody comments ....

Lost-yet again !

The inevitable happened...

After safeguarding my specs for almost 8 months, I had to lose it.It was quite natural .It had to go and I had to let it go.It had been quite sometime since I lost anything and it had to be those glasses,which empowered my vision , that had to ditch me this time.

And how it vanished into thin air.We parked our car.Walked a few minutes to a building to get my badge , got them and got back into the car.I remember I had my specs on while I was sitting in the car...I remember I had taken them off while walking..and then I remember that there's got be something called glasses that are not there ! And what I dont remember is what happened in between ! My mind just went blank when I pleaded it for help in rewinding the sequence of events.I tried going back slowly in my mind .. like they show in movies... step by step .. but i could get only to the latest step .

Phew ! To get new ones, I have to shell out 200-300$ and go bankrupt. Or manage with those poor eyes and a bad headache.And i am going with the second option.

Either my specs are very lucky (to have gotten lost in Florida ) or I am very unlucky.

So many Firsts at a time !

It finally happened . I am in Florida. And I am bombarded with questions like "How do you feel !!?? "  "How do you like America ??!! "  Everybody else is more excited than me .And I dunno why nothing is stirring me up .. I mean , i am taking it just like a trip to a neighbouring place !

It was the first time I actually went inside an airport... first time I shopped for soo many items for myself ..first time I got into a flight... the first time to take off and land .. to see the clouds float .. be dangeroulsy flying so many miles above the earth... the first time to be in the midst of differently colored people.. first time to stay away from my parents.. first time to travel alone for almost 26hrs... so many firsts..but i felt not much exhilaration..not much of an excitement... no idea  why.

Maybe its the movies to blame.I 've seen airports so many times.. foreign places ..foreign ppl ...in movies I mean :P Maybe I lived every scene that they showed that I felt nothing new when I was actually,really in the moment ... Ridiculous ?! I know..

Hey ya ! There was another first here ! And it sure pumped up my adrenaline ! On my way to Ft.Lauderdale from New york, I was seated at the window and was waiting for the next two places beside me to get occupied ( in the flight). A little later..2 guys came up.. and I was like wow ! They looked cool..americans.. and i m sure I blushed a little . (exaggeration). The next moment I saw them holding hands.... and stroking each other !!

Wow ! My first encounter..with gays ! Man ! I saw them in the movies too..but this sure made me sit up and observe all the way !
(For all those who are looking more..No, they dint do anything more than just stroking.. disappointed? Me too ..! )

My first dinner here : Had at Denny's .dont recall  the name of what I had.
My first breakfast    : peas masala, bread and bambino ( Courtesy : my colleague)
My first lunch          :  I was starving but dint have the energy to cook. Had bread and egg.
My first dinner        :  Maggi !! How i luv it !

My first proof of dumbness  :

I had to interact with the managers out here ,Vinodh and Harish , daily when I was in India. Vinodh sounded cheerful and Harish a little serious.Around 4 people came to pick me up.One of them introduced himself as Harish. And I thought how wrongly I pictured him.I thought he was serious..but he is cheerful as well.Well phones can be deceptive. That's what I thought.Cynthia and VK were client advisors.Thats what I was told.

And the next day, somebody else came up and introduced himself as Harish ! I was dumbfounded..I just stared and everybody laughed. It was Vinodh who had come to pick me up.Cynthia was his wife.VK was no client advisor but a CSC employee like me. And Harish was Harish.

I kept referring to Vinodh as Harish.. and everyelse too.They enacted their parts so well,I never got a doubt.

God ! I was so easily fooled.

My first  dunno wot:

I was advised not to sleep in the afternoon today.Their explanation was, If I slept all day,I would sleep all week .Due to the jetlag,it really was a herculean task. My eyes drooped and no matter what I did, I couldnt keep myslef awake.So I thought I would sleep for 10 min. And I slept.

Suddenly my phone rang.It was Sriraj .I said "Good morning !!"
He said "Oh! you slept !!"

It was still 8.30 PM.

So thats it.Sorry I couldnt make it short.

Time  to sleep finally !!!

a tryst with my bike

It was summer and what better way to cool our heels and ofcourse heads than to go shopping ..at central.!

As always, took out my scooty pep + .. my darling... constant , trustworthy,not-so-troublesome-except-a-few-flat-tyres  companion .. along with my sister.

We were parking the bike in the parking lot ..when all hell broke loose ! The weiredest of things happened...
I turned the key to shut down the engine..and it did'nt ! I tried again .. turning it as slowly as I could (Maybe the bike dint realise that I turned the key :P )  . Drrrr... It was still running.

I looked around sheepishly.I wanted to hide..My sister behaved as if she dint know me ! As if I was invisible and wotever was happening was not happening at all !

A bunch of good-looking boys were walking towards the parking...and my heart sank.. they SHOULDnt see me like this..NO !!  I wished I could vanish into thin air, .. "Oh God ! mein mar kyun nahi gayi .. :(   earth phat kyun nahi gaya..!!  "

I immediately put the keys back into the lock.. trying to look as normal as I could...
Now they wudnt know wot sort of stupid,utterly-mortifying situation I was  in. I dont know if they even noticed I was there..sweating..and praying dat I wouldnt be found out.. but the problem at hand felt much smaller wen they left ... Geee !

With another solid prayer.. which had only 1 word "Deva (God.. in marathi ) " ( My prayer sounds like this..deva deva deva deva..which goes on until interrupted ) , I turned off the engine..and in a slow motion ... started taking out the key..my lips quivering.. still praying fervently for that elusive Deva !

The engine din't die out... Drrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....... it still was running.. Damn  ! Devaaaaa !

Looked like God was on a holiday and in no mood to help instant devotees... In His world of instant dosa..instant saabudaana....and instant what-not , wots wrong with instant-devoutism ?

I had only one option left. Approach someone for help !

I pleaded with my sis to go and tell dat security fellow of our predicament..but no.. she glared at me like I asked her to marry  him... I admit that's much better than being laughed at ( just an exaggeration..dont jump to conclusions ! )

I have heard of bikes not starting at all.. seen a lot of flat tyres... seen bikes without silencers making that horrendous sound, as if  producing thunder... but this ! It was ,like, my engine attained moksha.... and the petrol  was serving as "amruth" and not letting it die ... uwaaaaaaiiin !

I looked around and when the coast was clear ( no good-looking boys around ) , I told the security fellow ..
"Bhaiyya.. gaadi band nahi ho raha .." How weird did that sound...


He gave that grin that I dreaded and came to have a look... He walked with an air that tried to convey that I was soo foolish and naive that  I dint know how to shut off my bike..!

He fiddled with the keys ... took them out .. And this time my Deva decided to answer my prayers... The engine died... (I guess the speed of sound fell short for the urgency with which I said them... All the "devas"  reached God a little late...)

You should have seen my face... and his ...

I gave him a sheepish smile.. murmured a "thank you" .. signalled my sister that she can acknowledge me now..and went in....to shop..

After an hour or so of scanning..we decided lifestyle was a better place to shop than central...and with that on the agenda.. hurried outside.

I kicked the bike for all trouble it gave us that morning..when nobody was looking..clenched my teeth as hard as I could and when I thought I took out all my anger on it, proceeded to start the bike.

I pressed the start button.  No sound.  I turned the key again and pressed the button. It dint make a sound.

Then I thought It needed a sound kicking.I put it on centre stand and tried kick-starting. It made a purring sound..and then died..I started kicking it furiously..till my legs and hands ached.

Last time, I felt engine "not-starting" was better then engine "not-dying" . This felt no better.

My sister dragged it along... upto half kilometer or so till we found a mechanic.

Our day was ruined..totally !

10 Ways to know Its a SoFtwaRe EnGineeR.. !

1)At Mc'D's counter,

"Sir, We dont accept card.Only cash.."
"Ok.No issues."

2)I had called up my friend the other day for some information and said
  "Is it the right time to talk to you ??"

3)" YOU HAVE TO FINISH THESE WORDLISTS BY EOD  !!  "   I shouted at my sister.
      How pathetic.. !

4) "Try to come home soon today.Its anyhow friday na " . It was my mom.
    "We have DELIVERABLES mom !!  "   That was me.

5) At the end of every email,
    "Please let me know if you need any further information "

6)  At a restaurant ,
     "Do you have corporate discounts ?? "

7)  Every sentence begins with Actually and ends with Actually..

     "Can you tell me how to reach tank bund ?"
     "Actually, go straight and then take a left.You can take an auto actually..but you can have  a    walk  too. Its a little far actually. "

8)  "Hey !" You know.. i m Sam , you know... just joined yesterday , you know ...you know..with  2.5 yrs experience..not much , you know..but not less too ..you know !! "

9)  " I am done for the day. Will start in a minute ! "

10)
The tenth one is left to you. Come up with a brilliant one and you can win ..ahem.. hmm... chocolates !!

Do tell me which one was the best plzzzzzzzzzzzz...  

nTng much..

NTNg much here right nw... working on my next post... my brain is working intermittently,hence the delay.So adding things to my draft as and wen i hit upon something.. and I think you very well understand that hitting upon something doesnt happen often :P

ciao....

As LuCk wUd HaVe It !!

Life is boring these days ..in office .. It has turned out to be total ulta.. days r being spent in loong anticipations..and expectations...expecting an important call.. anticipating an important , half-thrilling, half-mind-tensing message ...without much happening...Its already my third day in office ..new office ...

Something new came up few days back .. something I had wished for long.. something that I wished would happen atleast once in my lifetime ( I was half sure of it )... something that my friends talked a lot about..something they kept suggesting me to try .. and now ,I m stranded here...among a flood of thoughts..

When I first heard the news, I jumped up with joy! I was like wow !! Was it real... !Did i really hear wot I heard !! It was all excitement..esctasy..the first day ..and they all vanished the 2nd day ...

There are 2 reasons..

1)OK I nursed this secret wish ... OK its coming true.. but there was something more to my secret..I dint wish to enjoy it alone :(.
Wots the point when u cannot share the thrill.. not see the same happiness that u r feeling on another face...be a part of an opportunity thats 4 u alone .. where the space beside u is gng to be vacant... Nooo.. this is not wot I dreamt of !

2)Next,I am get married on Oct 13th.. just 4 months from now .. I was dreaming of all the shopping i would be doing .. sarees..dresses. jewellery.. sandals..mehndi programme.. my hair styles.. I was planning on doing some background wrk,,go window shopping.. zero in on the best .. try all hairstyles ..write a list of "to-do" things and go about it .. I was so excited.. I guess every gal wud dream of this ..considering all the pampering, she is gng to be the queen .. she wud choose things for herself. and ofcourse the best..! 

But all this is gng for a toss now ! The thing that has come up is gng to foil all my plans ...I have to do some things in a hurry and leave some other things for mom to do.... Awww.... how awful is dat ! not be able to shop for ur own wedding... boohooohoo.. 



Curtains down....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Drama over ..

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I m still sitting in anticipation....

Its just not Enuf !!

It was a lazy afternoon.The day was dragging on slowly..without much happening.The morning was spent browsing the newspaper,messing up in the kitchen and then idling.. desperate to do something fun ...

I opened my wardrobe ..( dunno wot made me to ); and a pile of clothes fell down.I looked at them in utter disgust and decided I had to revamp my clothe-line. It had been aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaages  since I shopped( if you can call 1 month ages ) and the thought made the ride in the scorching sun less un-bearable !

Koti is my usual adda to loot and burn a big hole in my pocket.I  planted my bike in between 2 more bikes , making mine stick out more onto the road.The shop wallah glared at me because I blocked the way into his shop..the pedestrians were angry that I left no room for them to walk... but who cares ! I was off shopping !
I said "paanch min mein aaungi bhayya..." and darted off !!

I walked along..slowly.. letting my eyes savor all the colors .. all the designs .. all the varieties .. A blue color bandhini dress , with lighter shades at the bottom looked tempting... I thought it was perfect, I can carry the color well.. i was conjuring up a design as to how i should stitch it when I realized i had a similar dress but of a different color !Aaah.... my heart almost broke !
There can never be two similar dresses ..mind u !

I dunno if it happens with everybody.. but I like every damn thing on sale there.. I always wish I had enough money to buy atleast 1 thing from every shop ! The colorful earrings... bangles.. dresses... nailpolishes....bracelets.. clutches... u name it , I want it !  :D


My eyes are never on the road... with 3 bags in hands ( yea.. I finished my shopping.. had come  prepared to buy 3 dresses but ended up buying 6 !! ) I was still checking out the ones hung outside... I seemed to like them more than wot I had just bought .. Even when the shop fellow pulled out materials from his shelf,my eyes always went after the dresses the lady beside me was looking at ! He was making every pathetic attempt to satisfy me..telling me how well the contrast will work on me.. how beautifully u can stitch it.. but I had lost my heart out to that beautiful pink dress the lady had just packed.. phew !

I dunno if every gal feels this way ..( most of them do ) but I feel like owning a clothes store.. so I can try alllll of them ! I want to earn enuf money to buy Kothi itself ! Or mayb  marry a person who can own it :P

I was back home... showed  them to my mom....

" there was this pretty dress ma.. pink color .. it was very different... the print was.....................................................................................   "


My heart was still with that pink dress ....

Why do I blog ??

As my title clearly indicates , this is going to be a rather simple and short post ...

I was thinking the other day ( I sumtimes think..trust me ) how and why I started blogging ?

As far as my memory can take me , I cannot recollect a single moment where I had the urge to write .. to give a form to my thoughts .. where I was overflowing with ideas and looking for ways to capture them ...

I dont have any pre-conceived notions about anything .. I dont strongly criticize or condemn anything ..I am neither philosophical nor religious .. Simply put , I am not at all a thinker .. just a simple ordinary person...

I have one small desire though .. desire to capture my moments, moments I may never experience again .. moments I may forget when days pass .. thoughts that cross my mind which may never occur to me again.. how/what I used to think when I was 20 sumthing... the good and the bad.. everything I can about me .. my life .. my ppl..

And this is how I do.. I saved my 2 months salary when I started my career as a school teacher ( recession time u know .. cognizant was later) and bought a camera. I always yearned for one since college..

The first time when Aishu tried to walk .. the times when we frnds had a good laugh .. the times when there were 4 pairs of hands but one tiffin box ... how my face changed from when I was a kid to what I am now .. These are worth going back to ..

And then the feelings....

They can only be felt .. and written ...

When I turn 60 something..when my memory starts failing me ...when I have time to sit back and ponder...think about my best and worst times .. i will have my blog to go back to !

PS : In short , My blog is my life's running notes ....