Time to change shoes..

When I look at my dad...

He doesnt look the same these days.He is getting older and the various tests life puts him through are proving to be tough and more than he bargained for..

When I look at his eyes..

I can see they are tired.. and i can also see that they are trying harder to hold back the twinkle that always reminded me of his childlike energy.


When I look at his face..

The once tough face appears withdrawn..
there are more lines now, each telling a story that screams of hard work...


I realised this when he picked me up from office one day..on his bike.The once strong hold that he had, how deftly he used to maneuver through the enormous traffic.His strength fails him now.He was unable to drive steadily..especially with me behind.. his hands ached and his head throbbed..
I said.."Baba..you are getting old..."

He is tough, but the sailing seems to be tougher..The outbursts have increased,patience levels dipping lower n lower.Pain seems more painful and less endurable..

And when I look at him again.. I remember the times when,instead of being grateful that he still picks me up from the bus stop after a hectic day, I got impatient with him for being a little late,.. the times I got irritated instead of hearing him out patiently when he told me something twice so I wudnt forget.. the times when I answered him back when I should have taken it in my stride... the times when I was blind enough not to have seen that all he needed was a little patience and more care..

...and I hate myself..

He is trying ..trying hard to remain the same he was 10 yrs ago.Back then,he could easily work 15 hrs a day..walk miles of distance.. and yet manage to take us out for dinner or rush to somebody who needed him..without a wince..without a whine...And he is trying because he has no son who can look after bigger things.I try to fit into that role...to relieve him of the burdens that I can shoulder instead.. but its still limited.

But I try to bring him to face reality.He is not 40 something man now,with loads of overflowing vigor.He is bordering 60 and should have the much needed rest.

When I look at my dad now..I feel so proud.Here is my dad who knows no limits to benevolence.. has endless time for family... who goes an extra mile to keep his word..who carries his absent-mindedness gracefully..who can cry while watching kabhi khushi kabhi gham and yet lament "what third-class movie it was !"....

And when I look at my dad.. How secure I feel.. I can always remain his little kid and he , my strong father.How I want to keep him happy...

PS: This is for all those who have parents hovering around 60s or more.. to let them know that times have changed..and its time we change our shoes...time to exchange roles... and stand by them.

After reading this, you will love to fail...

Failure doesnt mean you are a failure..
It does mean you havent succeeded yet.

Failure doesnt mean you have accomplished nothing..
It does mean you have learned something.

Failure doesnt mean you have been a fool..
It does mean you had a lot of faith.

Failure doesnt mean you have been disgraced..
It does mean you were willing to try.

Failure doesnt mean you dont have it..
It does mean you have to do something in a different way.

Failure doesnt mean you are inferior..
It does mean you are not perfect.

Failure doesnt mean you have wasted your life..
It does mean you have a reason to start afresh.

Failure doesnt mean you should give up..
It does mean you should try harder.

Failure doesnt mean you will never make it..
It does mean you will take a little longer.

Failure doesnt mean God has abandoned you..
It does mean God has a better idea !!!

Let go and let God...

As children bring their broken toys
with tears for us to mend,
I brought my broken dreams to God
because he was my friend.
But, then instead of leaving him
in peace to work alone,
I hung around and tried to help
with ways that were my own.
At last I snatched them back and cried,
"How can You be so slow?"
"My child",He said ,"what could I do?
"You never did let go."

PS : Read it somewhere...

God has not promised that our skies will always be blue, but He has promised to see us through.

A rocking friendshipday !

It must have been the hundredth time that I glared at the watch... the clock was ticking lazyily and the time refused to move faster..

The day had begun with me shooting off emails to all my friends..furiously typing msgs telling them how important they were to me...wishing them loads of luck on this friendship day.At the end of all this furore,i sat back ,pride swelling up from within.I had a few really good friends and I made an effort to make them realise what they meant to me today.And that made me happy.

But the feeling evaporated soon.I had a little fall out with one of my best friends today and that made me miserable..I was too egoistic to call her back again and kept sinking in a wave of thoughts that swept me away from normalcy.I kept recalling previous incidences , trying to convince myself that I was not wrong in behaving this way..and the recollection dint make me any happier.I stopped cribbing about this when another thought made its entry silently,nibbling my mind for attention..

I was wishing the day would end soon.the day ended but the night doesnt seem to cooperate.Its as if i can snuggle inside the blanket and abolish all the thoughts from my cosy territory.Tomorrow..new day..new beginning..new feeling
Chalo..wish me luck.I need it badly.

eVeryThing outta nOthing !!

It was scorching summer and the sun was very generous in spreading his heat that day.Priya and Rakesh had decided to meet up that day at a friend's house.She was dressed in a light green kurti and skin fitting jeans and he was wearing a striped T, looking fresh and handsome.
"Hi!" Priya waved as he came towards her on his bike.She was on her bike too,Scooty pep+,her constant companion.She was always the first to reach the meeting point and today, she had to wait a good ten minutes for him to show up.She would'nt have minded if not the for the sun hitting hard on her.She hid her irritation and smiled at him.. She loved his company and was longingly looking forward to spend the entire day with him..
She picked her best that day..brand new kurti and jeans.. had dabbed a little eyeliner .. and was wearing the watch he gifted her.None caught his attention as he failed to compliment her..minimum decency u knw !!A girlfriend always expects to be admired ..or atleast teased for the efforts she puts in to impress the boyfrnd...A simple ,sweet lie, told as a truth will only increase your chances of a beautiful day... hai na??
Now having been pissed off for the second time.. she was beginning to worry..wots wrong with this boy.. Its not that he was indifferent.. he was the most caring..most romantic.. and fairly knew how to win a girlfrnd over.. but all these qualities sat on the backburner today as priya burned from inside...
They had started off.. to their frnd's house..on separate bikes(Now, this was his next blunder...The backseat is the legal right that automatically a girlfrnd inherits with her status..and now she was being deprived of that !!! )
She was still fuming... when Rakesh did the missing act. He was nowhere to be seen..she reduced her speed...and looked around for him..expecting him to catch up."What could have happened..? Did he run out of fuel?or a flat tyre?? He could have phoned me..He always makes me do what I hate most..WAITING !!!"
After what seemed an eternity,Rakesh appeared..smiling..as if nothing happened.. One look at priya and he knew she was cross.And one sweet smile and eyes that said sorry..everything melted...that was the magic between them.. they cannot be cross for long.. 2 yrs of courtship had made them expert face-readers..and each ensured the smile never faded from their faces..

They went along.. Rakesh leading the way..and stealing glances at Priya occasionally from the rear-view mirror...She knew this and let a smile appear on her face...There was some ruffling sound..and priya diverted her attention to where it came from.. She saw a cover with "Archies" written on it fly by..There was something dangling from Rakesh's handle..on closer look she found it was a small,cute purse..

Tears welled up Priya's eyes...How thoughtful of him.. and how thoughtless of her...

She wondered how he could make small moments feel special.. he had that innate quality of presenting things in a cute way,she realised.The day was turning out to be nothing of remembrance..now ,it was everything for her.. This was one of those beautiful memories she would cherish forever...

It all sums up to how you fill the moments of your life...a little effort can bring wide smiles..it speaks volumes of how much you care and how much you want him/her to feel special...

PS: Hope you liked it..Will come up with more...I just realised the "writing" thing is still alive in me :-P