lOVe

We thought it was the coolest thing we did , 5 years ago, on this very day. We professed love for each other and were glad the feeling was mutual.We were revelling in our new-found relationship..unaware of the challenges life was going to throw at us...not knowing what to expect..careless about our future..we were selfish. It was just "us" then.

I am happy the "us" still remains.Solidly intact. :)

It had more to it than just movies,roaming around on bikes, having panipuri on the roadside, bunking classes, chatting for hours, surprise gifts and saying "I Love You"

Its not about cosy postures that the movie posters show , its not at all about romantic punchlines, long drives, romantic dinners , wearing same coloured dresses, pick ups and drops...This is just the rosy picture..

There is more to it than meets the eye.

There was a time when a small gift, a long drive, occasional lunches, complimenting each other meant love.Atleast, it was a way of showing that you love him/her.
And then comes change.A big one.

Love, like anything else, evolves.It cannot remain in that stage forever.It starts demanding maturity.And strength. Its not the cosy postures anymore.There will be lesser gifts. Love is being happy despite these. Love is knowing he still loves you. Love is  knowing he is still there for you.

For me , its a great learning experience.I know myself now like never before. I was like on the road to self-discovery where I was sure startled by my unpleasant traits.
I came face-to-face with the other side of me which I never knew existed.
We were bettering eachother, overcoming our flaws.Yes, flaws. Nobody is perfect.

A lot of things changed over these 5 years. And a lot din't.

We still fight, but for better reasons.

We still disagree, but learnt to accept gracefully.

We still gift each other, not monetory now-a-days.

I still feel jealous, but learnt to brush it off.

We still shout at each other, but we understand.

This is where we stand now. And I am proud of where we are :)

Chillar party

A very cute , adorable , hilarious movie. It will make you laugh. And before you know, your eyes become moist.I struggled to stop my tears ! Those innocent , arrogant , sometimes sensible, sometimes stubborn bunch of cuties gave me a real good time. How I loved them . Each is cute in his won way.

I particularly liked Jhangya who doesnt like wearing a chaddi :D
His antics , dramatics, attitude is just hilarious ! The way he says halla bol ! , the way he tries to hide his ignorance when asked what an NOC is,.. DDLJ ..and stuff.. man ! awesome !He is such a nautanki !
I was actually laughing out loud !

The TV show was good too.Made sense . Thats the only way a child should have dealt with the minister.
Because he hasnt seen life much yet.What they have learnt is from the school, from the books . And its put to best use.

In short,  Its a must watch !

Confessions !

                       

                                      Its high time I made a confession.

Nothing in this blog is fiction.None imaginary as assumed by some. The various characters I created just bear a different name. The girl is me and the boy is him :)

Wanna read them again with me in mind ? Here u go! Not many , but still...
The colorful Night
Everything Outta nOthing !
When U knOw its HiM :)

When you know its HiM :)

 This has been long pending. I had this urge to write everytime I was in "the" moment.But I felt it more important to bask in the happiness , to savour every second of the truth that just  dawned , with a smile that originated from the lips and reached the eyes.

The moment is when you know its HIM.

I had this so many times. Even before we decided to be a couple. Some sound silly  but they meant a lot to me then. Some incidents just linger in my mind...

It was raining heavily.I was waiting at the bus stop. I just wished he would comeby. And there he was ,on his bike , dripping wet. I guess he was thinking about me because he was rightly able to identify me among scores of other people, all under umbrellas.I dint go with him , something stopped me though a major portion of me wanted to go with him. We were still friends , still in that beautiful phase where feelings play hide-n-seek, secret smiles, where we were constantly looking for hints that suggested a possible relationship.

I was not feeling well that day.I was contemplating if I should ask him to drop me till my office. It was as if he read my mind when he offered to drop me  even before I asked.
Whats the big deal you ask ?
He drives 25km to office, with me behind. Its an extra 8km roundabout trip to my office.I was contemplating because I know how much pain it is to drive 50km everyday.

We were travelling to office.On his bike. Both were quiet for a long time. Then he took my hand in his and said "Love you".My moist eyes stand testimony of the effect it had on me.

I forgot my purse yet again.In the theater we just walked out from. The next show had already started. We both waited till the interval, then went in and started looking under the seats awkwardly. Embarrasing it was !
He scolded me left and right for being so careless.
I was surprised to find a smile on my face when I should actually be crying.
I sensed a feeling of belonging to him , his voice was firm but the eyes said something else.

I  feel nothing can go wrong with him around.Even if it does, I can bank on him to steer us clear. We always ended up all-smiles when we faced problems together !

I can be myself in front of him. There is no pretense.Never. He can see me through.

I dont mind acting stupid when he is around. I know he doesnt mind :D

My eyes light up whenever I see him.

I still try to impress him

I still blush.

I still make a fuss over how I look when I have a date with him.
   

I still long for that look in his eyes.

One look at him , I see the same depth, same truthfulness , same commitment in the decision we made 6 years ago.

Its not because of these reasons that I think its him. These only make my belief stronger.Such realisations help me sail through when the weather gets rough. It reminds me of what is between us. Of what we share. That we are not meant to wither.

Waking up to a lesson...!

Its an amazing feeling..to be able to sleep till late mornings.There is nothing that can beat the satisfaction and bliss it provides.Oblivious to all the chaos around, blissfully unware of  the hurried movements of my mom and dad going about their usual chores, I was buried. In deep sleep. Under a thick blanket. Lost in my own world.

Until I was rudely woken up.

By none other than the maid.

I heard something that sounded like a distant thrashing that slowly became louder and louder. Well it was not the sound, but I was becoming more and more alive , and coming back to my senses.My eyes still refused to open and so I pulled over the pillow over my ears to shut the noise out.

The noise was compounded by the running water, screeching sound of buckets..and more thrashing.Of the clothes. I opened my eyes a teeny bit and saw a blurred figure in the bathroom.That was our bai. She was washing our clothes.

I cursed her for not doing her job silently. For being inconsiderate. For making those horrendous sound. For not taking care as to not wake me up.

I looked at the watch with disgust.

It said 9.00 AM

Just then she turned. I could see sweat dripping from the brow. She was carrying a bucket full of water..and gasping for breath. I could see her nerves popping out of her arm due to the weight.

All my anger..disgust..B.P vanished.

What must she have been thinking all along ? A young gal, sleeping without budging till 9 am while she was cleaning my clothes, sweeping the floor and doing all dirty odd jobs in my house.Everyday is the same .No weekend. No holiday . Not until she fell sick. Same old dirty job. And meagre money.

With this realisation, I woke up.

... Its back to create a ruffle ....

Life is not letting me be in peace... It keeps reminding me that it cannot be perfect..there exists some besharam creature called problem that creeps stealthily..slyly..and very soon you see ripples on the once calm surface..

Ok. They are not problems actually..but minor glitches, hiccups that created a slight furore.Just when I thought that all was well and sat back, It raised its ugly hood again..testing my patience, my attitude , almost defining my character. I had to come out unscathed and leave others unscathed too.That was a major challenge.This time it was Not only me slipping into the pit..I was dragging quite a few people with me.

It was all momentary..the anguish..the pain..the "wots-happening-with-me !!" feeling , confusion, tension, nervousness and what not . I guess everybody has a phase in their life where they are put to test, and its most important for them to come out with flying colors.I think its my turn and I am trying my best to make the best out of it.

When you have wonderful parents for support..when you have that awesome person who stands by you all the time..and most importantly a forgetful mind which easily forgets the pain inflicted on it..life becomes easier!

And ya.. I also believe that things happen for a reason and believe me, that relieves me like anything!
That makes me look at the problem at hand from a different angle, with a positive thought and the problem seems like a smaller problem. No. It doesnt vanish.It only becomes smaller.And better.

Have to pack its bags and throw it out..off I go !

Bye!